101. Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes.

100. Baby are you a lion? Because I can see you lion in my bed tonight.

99. Let’s play carpenter. First we’ll get hammered, then I’ll nail you.

98. Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.

97. They say your tongue is the strongest muscle in your body. Wanna fight?

96. I enjoy girls who look like you do baby

95. Hey baby, will you be my love buffet so I can lay you on the table and take what I want?

94. Do you like Krispy Kreme? Because I’m gonna glaze your donut.

93. I think I ought to tell you what people are saying behind your back. Nice butt!

92. You’re so hot even my zipper is falling for you.

91. Nice legs, let’s eat out.

90. I’m accepting applications If you want to apply, requirements include your phone number.

89. Let’s play Titanic. When I shout “Iceberg”, you go down.

88. Hi, I’m a burglar and I’m going to smash your back door in.

87. Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.

86. What’s my name? People call me “Bar Stool” because of my third leg.

85. I was told I have a Vitamin D deficiency. Could you help me?

84. I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.

83. Hey, I’m not a dentist but I bet I could give you a filling?

82. I lost my keys… Can I check your pants?

81. Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you’ve got a pretty sweet butt.

80. When I saw you, I lost my tongue. Can I put yours in my mouth?

79. My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?

78. You smell like trash. May I take you out?

77. Do you like to draw? Because I put the D in Raw.

76. I want to melt in your mouth not in your hand.

75. I’m a businessman. I work in orifices. Got any openings?

74. Come and sit on my lap and let’s get things straight between us.

73. Girl, your bone structure is giving my bone structure.

72. I lost my pants. Do you mind if I wrap your legs around me instead?

71. Just checked my battery life, it’s at 69%.

70. Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some?

69. I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.

68. I’m not trying to pressure you. I don’t want to have sex without mutual consent. Oh, and by the way, you have my consent.

67. I’d love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. And the ones on your face.

66. Girl, I like every bone in your body. Especially mine.

65. Your place or mine?

64. My face is leaving in 15 minutes. Be on it.

63. Baby I want to wear you like a pair of sunglasses…One leg over each ear.

62. I have 206 bones in my body, want to give me another one?

61. I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?

60. Is your name winter? Because you’ll be coming soon.

59. Do you like whales? Because we can go hump back at my place.

58. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

57. Your Dad must have been a baker, because you’ve got a nice set of buns.

56. Do you work at a butcher’s shop? ‘Cause you’re giving me a T-bone.

55. You can call me “The Fireman”. Because I turn the hoes on.

54. Want to see if you can add “has an awesome gag reflex” to your resume?

53. It’s true there are plenty more fish in the sea, but you’re the only one I want to catch and mount back at my place.

52. Are you a woodchuck? Because I can see your wood.

51. That’s a beautiful smile, but it’d look even better if it was all you were wearing.

50. Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin my dick.

49. Smile if you want to have sex with me.

48. Are you tired? Want to change that?

47. Let me make you brunch.

46. Can you do telekinesis? Because you’ve made a part of me move without even touching it.

45. When I see you, sea levels aren’t the only thing rising.

44. Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.

43. Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of semen waiting for you.

42. That dress would look great on my bedroom floor.

41. Those look like quality pants; do you mind if I take them off?

40. Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging that ass.

39. My couch pulls out but I don’t.

38. I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

37. You are on my to-do list tonight.

36. I can tell you’re into yoga, why don’t you spend a little time showing me just how flexible you are?

35. You look like an extremely hard worker and I have an opening that you can fill.

34. You don’t know how many times I had to swipe left to find you.

33. I want you to be the girl who takes my virginity.

32. I must be a beaver, because I’m dying for your wood.

31. The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?

30. Please don’t let this go to your head, but do you want some?

29. Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?

28. If I were a squirrel and you were a tree, I’d store my nuts in your hole.

27. Are you a drill sergeant? Because you’ve got my privates standing at attention.

26. I’ve just received government funding for a four hour expedition to find your G spot.

25. It must be Christmas, because I can’t wait to unwrap your package.

24. Do you run track? Because I heard you Relay want this dick.

23. I seem to have lost my number, can I have yours?

22. That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

21. If it’s true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

20. I’m no weatherman, but you can expect a few inches tonight.

19. I’m having troubles sleeping by myself, can you sleep with me?

18. Your smile is almost as big, warm, and lovely as my penis.

17. I’m not a weather man, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.

16. I find your lack of nudity disturbing.

15. Are you a shark? Because I’ve got some swimmers for you to swallow.

14. Are you an exam? Because I have been studying you like crazy.

13. Was your dad a baker? Because you’ve got a nice set of buns.

12. Are you a washing machine? Because I want to put my dirty load in you.

11. You know, I’m doing a lot better now that I’ve matched with a pretty lady.

10. Aside from being extremely sexy, what else do you do for a living?

9. Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.

8. I swiped right, because I knew I wanted to.

7. Do you sleep on your stomach? [No]. Can I?

6. Those breasts look very heavy. Shall I hold them for you?

5. If I was a robot and you were one too, If I lost a bolt would you give me a screw?

4. I could’ve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping you’re a slut instead.

3. You know how they say the skin is the largest organ in the body? Not in my case.

2. Do you like cherries? If not, can I have yours?

1. That sweater looks amazing on you. I bet I would too!